Waiting for transport in jail was one of the worst things ever. This is the setup when you have a court appearance to make when you are housed in Durango: you are woken up between 3-4 am, taken from whatever house you are living in to the "transport house" which is D7 (its the transport house because the back of the building has easy street access), you sit down on the ground with anywhere from 20-50 other inmates, then they do roll call. When your name is called, you go up to get your foot shackles and handcuffs put on, then you go line up on the wall and wait until they are done. Once they are done, you pile into busses sorted by the different courts. The only courts I went to were superior (big boy) courts, in Mesa and on 4th Ave in Phoenix. When you are going to either of those superior courts, you go to 4th Ave. first. Then you go into a holding tank, picking up a ladmo bag as you enter. You're there for a couple hours. At this point, if you are going to 4th ave court, you're transferred into a different holding tank until your docket's time. If you're going to Mesa, you are put into a separate holding tank for another few hours. Then, you get onto another, smaller bus, and are driven to Mesa and put in yet another very small holding tank (maybe 12 square feet) with a lot of other people. Mesa sucks, because they do not remove your handcuffs or foot shackles the entire time. It also sucks, because there are only 2 buses back to 4th ave. One is at 10am and one is at 6pm. So, if you have a court appearance at 9:30 that runs passed 10, you will be escorted back to that little holding tank and must wait there with no food, and with your full restraints on until 6pm. No TV, just a cold bench to sit on, filthy cell, and the company of other inmates. At least if you are being seen at 4th ave, they remove your handcuffs while you're in the tank and put them on right before you walk into the courtroom. Once transport arrives, you are taken back to 4th ave. Then guess what? You get to sit in another holding tank until the Durango bus comes. All in all, for a 5 minute court appearance in Mesa Superior court, it can take over 12 hours!
In one of the small holding tanks in Mesa, I remember this hilarious drawing someone did on the wall. It was a cartoon of Napolean bent over with his pants down, spreading cheeks, and with projectile turds coming out of his backside. It had the caption "Napullean Buttaparte" and I must have laughed out loud for 10 solid minutes when I saw it. Funny in first grade, funny now. I'm incredibly mature.
Today I am grateful to be free. I'm grateful that if I'm going somewhere, I can just go whenever I choose and don't have to wait in a holding tank wearing handcuffs and shackles. I'm grateful that I do not have any upcoming court appearances. I am grateful that I was able to see Napullean Buttaparte shooting poop rockets out of his hind quarters. I'm grateful for Mountain Dew Voltage and Baja Blast.
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